Embracing Presence

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Embracing Presence

February 16, 2024 | Jessie Nolasco-Sandino, LMSW | 5 min. read

Presence OMHG Blog

What exactly is ‘presence’? It’s a simple yet profound concept. Presence is about embracing the here and now.

Our thoughts and emotions often pull us into the future or anchor us to the past, leaving little room for the beauty of the current moment. We might wonder, why prioritize the present when there’s so much on our minds — job promotions, financial concerns, and relationships? These are valid aspects of life, but notice how they often come with stress and anxiety.

Being present is about finding peace in the present moment, wherever you may find yourself, amidst the thoughts/feelings swirling around.

The practice of presence isn’t always straightforward; it can be filled with challenges and setbacks. 

In a world filled with hustle and bustle, we often feel compelled to think ahead and worry about what’s next. It’s understandable, but we must also make time to just be present, to let go, to relax, and unwind. In doing so, we create a space where significant change can unfold, aligning with the desires and goals we hold for our own lives.

As the article by Elizabeth Perry suggests, “being present… is about where your mind is living.” Anxieties and fears live in the future while depression and regrets often lie in the past. However, peace of mind is often thought of as being in the present, where the two meet in the here and now. 

Here are some ways we can practice being and embracing presence:

1. Focused and paced breathing

This tried and true method works because it recenters our mind on the here and now, rather than letting our mind wander. It helps maintain a focus on our surroundings and what we are feeling at this moment in time. It also helps to focus our attention on body sensations, thoughts and feelings in the present moment.

2. Try mindfulness meditation practices

Although it can be difficult to build such habits, meditation can be an incredibly helpful source in our development of presence. In the practice of mindfulness and/or meditation, we begin to incorporate focused attention, relaxation, gentleness and peace of mind. Mindfulness meditations are all about intentionality and help create an intentional thought process that can aid in our lifestyle, livelihood and healing journey. 

3.  Limit social media time

Being a tremendous tool in connecting with others, social media also has its downsides. Constantly scrolling through feeds or reels can create longing for the past with a look at old photos; or a desire for others’ life leading to comparison, loss of confidence and genuine connections. The reality is we all struggle and one captured moment of bliss doesn’t necessarily reflect spontaneity, eccentricity or debauchery. Limiting our time on social media can help in building intentional thought processes such as being present with ourselves and others.

How to Be Present: Discover the Benefits of Here and Now (betterup.com)

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Using the 5-Point Scale for Emotions Expression and Management

Home » Blog » Using the 5-Point Scale for Emotions Expression and Management

Using the 5-Point Scale for Emotions Expression and Management

February 8, 2024 | Joy Thibeault, LCSW-C | 5 min. read

When emotions are high and coping skills have flown from memory, what is a person to do? Use the trusty five point scale, that’s what!

A simple five point scale can be an invaluable tool at home for the whole family, as well as at school for kids! The scale provides common language a family (or classroom) can share to better communicate, especially around difficult things like emotions identification and expression. It assists in making emotion a more concrete and understandable concept. Additionally, it provides modeling opportunities for parents or teachers, as well as making coping strategies readily available.

A five point scale can also assist children in developing personalized coping strategies and dealing with strong emotions.

Emotion Scale Legos | OMHG Blog
Many things can be useful to rate on your five point scale. It could be how angry you are, how depressed you are, how difficult you anticipate a task to be versus how difficult it actually was after completing it, and of course to determine how big (or small) a specific problem is. As you can see, the possibilities are endless once the common language and understanding of scaling are reached. Be creative and remember to model the concept and procedure, including strategy use, aloud so that it becomes the norm for you and your family.

So how does it work? Simple. First you need to create your scale and fill it out.

List emotions that might fit or describe each number. For example, you might write calm beside one, maybe frustrated or down for two, maybe furious or terrified for five, and so on. Then in the column beside that, come up with personalized strategies that help you when you are experiencing an emotion at that numbered level. Strategies could look like: listening to music, going for a walk, drawing, being alone, moving to a particular room or space, calling a certain person, etc., and should be specific to the individual. It may take some time to gather or try out strategies but having them centrally located later will be invaluable.

When first introducing the concept, just for some practice, you could try scaling characters’ feelings during a show, or role play some situations and practice scaling those. Once everyone has the idea, you can move on to “real life” scenarios as they arise. Below are some examples of ways a parent could use the scale moving forward.

Example #1

A parent using the scale to help an angry child might look like this::

Parent to angry child: “It looks like you might be feeling kind of angry.  Can you tell me how angry you are using your five point scale?”

Child points to a 4

Parent: “Oh….so very angry then.  I’m so glad you told me.  Let’s see what your five point scale suggests for strategies (reference the strategies for number 4 and ask the child which one they might like to try first).”

Example #2

An example of a parent modeling might look like this:

Angry parent: “Dad is feeling really upset and is at a 5 right now.  I am going to take a break and use my strategies to get back down to a 1 or 2 and then we can talk about it.”

This scale and ideas are based on: The Incredible 5-Point Scale by Buron & Curtis

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Social Media Misdiagnosis

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Social Media Misdiagnosis

February 7, 2024 | Vanessa Buonopane, Psy.D. | 7 min. read

TikTok. Instagram. YouTube. What do all of these social media platforms have in common? They are wonderful for getting mass amounts of information out to people. One type of information provided is information related to mental health.

Although this is a great way to educate people on mental health disorders, it can also lead to self-diagnosis and, often, misdiagnosis.

Social Media Misdiagnosis OMHG Blog

So, what’s the problem?

While mental health clinicians want people to learn about their diagnoses and connect with others who share similar experiences, we also want you to take in accurate information about mental health diagnoses. One study examined the reach and accuracy of information on autism on TikTok, finding that “videos associated with the #Autism hashtag accrued 11.5 billion views collectively. An examination of the top 133 videos providing informational content on autism…showed that 27% of the videos were classified as accurate, while 41% were classified as inaccurate and 32% as overgeneralized. Videos created by healthcare professionals were more likely to include accurate information” (Aragon-Guevara, Castle, Sheridan, and Vivanti, 2023).

For instance, numerous individuals come into our office for psychological evaluations to determine if they have Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) after stating they are having problems with attention and concentration in school, at work, at home, and/or in public settings. While there is a portion of people who legitimately meet the diagnostic criteria for ADHD, many individuals’ difficulties with attention and concentration might be linked to other concerns, such as depression and anxiety (Note: Check out this article for more information on ADHD).

If you or someone you know believes that they identify with a diagnosis on social media but are not formally diagnosed, it can be helpful to encourage the individual to undergo a psychological evaluation to determine if they meet the criteria for a specific diagnosis.

It is important to note that not all symptoms are clinical, meaning we all experience normal ups and downs in life that do not constitute a mental health diagnosis. You can have normal anxiety when giving a presentation and not be diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder. Similarly, you can have a bad day and not meet the criteria for Major Depressive Disorder. When it comes to diagnosing, individuals must meet a certain number of the clinical criteria and, in some cases, those symptoms must be present for specific time periods. They must also cause significant distress in a variety of areas, such as at home, work/school, and in social settings.

Ultimately, social media is not all bad, as it has provided platforms for discussing mental health and has made great strides for “visibility, reducing stigma, and helping people gain the insight they may have no other way to access.” For some people, social media has helped them feel less alone. When attempting to understand yourself or your child, the best thing to do is seek professional help and do your research on more than social media (e.g., research articles, academic/educational websites, and government agencies such as the National Institutes of Health).

References:

Aragon-Guevara, D., Castle, G., Sheridan, E. et al. The Reach and Accuracy of Information on Autism on TikTok. J Autism Dev Disord (2023). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10803-023-06084-6 

https://www.verywellmind.com/people-are-using-social-media-to-self-diagnose-5217072 

https://www.cnn.com/2023/07/20/tech/tiktok-self-diagnosis-mental-health-wellness/index.html 

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The Strength of Spirituality

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The Strength of Spirituality

January 26, 2024 | Jessie Nolasco-Sandino, LMSW | 5 min. read

Although religion and spirituality have been synonymous throughout history, in the last couple of decades spirituality has detached itself as a separate entity and therefore can sometimes be overlooked.

As this distinction has become more apparent, research has grown to show the benefits of spirituality in an individual’s health. Research has shown that these benefits are not only mental but physical as well.

The Strength of Spirituality OMHG Blog

Based on the dictionary, spirituality is defined as: the quality of being concerned with the human spirit or soul as opposed to only physical matter.

By this definition, individuals who integrate spiritual practices with the physical properties of the human experience, expand their mental awareness to include themes of the soul or spirit that are often forgotten or unknown. Spirituality allows an emotional attunement to the unseen forces or energy surrounding the physical body.

Here are some benefits of integrating spirituality in one’s life or practice:

1. Spirituality can help develop strength and overcome hardships.

By using spirituality as a catalyst, people face hardships head on and overcome them far more successfully then those who don’t. Having spirituality to rely on ties into a sense of meaning or purpose that is assigned to these difficulties in life and in turn transform them into what might be life lessons, or assets in growth.

2. Spiritual people make healthier choices.

Although spirituality and religion are different; there are some similarities. One of these areas that the two crossover is in the point of tradition. Spirituality does not require tradition, but in the practice of it there are habits that are formed in the experience. These habits (or traditions) can help individuals avoid unhealthy behavior as it is often a point to treat the body with respect.

3. Spirituality may help you live longer.

Research has suggested that people who engage in spiritual or religious activities had 18% reduction in mortality (Lucchetti G, Lucchetti AL, Koenig HG, 2011). Some researchers think that these results are exaggerated, while most agree that there is a positive relationship between religious and spiritual practices to better health outcomes. For example, imagine a single parent struggling to make ends meet and under the daily pressures to take care of his/her children, may turn to spirituality or faith to endure the daily struggles and in the process finds comfort, solace and faith as well.

4. Spiritual community can help improve your well-being.

Participating in spiritual traditions that foster spiritual fellowship, such as attending bible study or a yoga retreat, can be sources of strong relationships and social support. This may create a sense of belonging, support, and community. Whether you follow religious leaders, shamans, palm readers, gurus or other spiritual outlets, having a safe, open community of people to share similar faiths and beliefs, have been proven to increase well-being and bolster life expectancy.

For me, spirituality in psychotherapy and beyond is an intimate dance with the profound; a journey that can elicit feelings of awe, tranquility, and a sense of personal connection to the cosmos. Science will show us that these practices create expansive thinking and can lead to flow states, growing our intuition and creativity. Humans are here to create!

This month, let’s set our compass towards the spiritual horizon. Let’s seek the deeper meaning that lies beneath the surface. Embrace the experiences that stir your soul, whether they be moments of quiet contemplation, the rhythmic flow of your breath in meditation, or the profound connection found in the embrace of nature’s beauty.

As you open yourself to your own spiritual journey, remember that it is a personal odyssey — one that can be as unique as your fingerprint. Let the whispers of the divine guide you, and let the search for meaning illuminate your path. May this year be more than just a turning of the calendar; may it be a transcendental voyage into the depths of your own spiritual awakening.

Sources:

Why Is Spirituality Important? | Taking Charge of Your Health & Wellbeing (umn.edu)

Lucchetti G, Lucchetti AL, Koenig HG. (2011) Impact of spirituality/religiosity on mortality: comparison with other health interventions. Explore New York. Jul-Aug; 7(4):234-8. doi: 10.1016/j.explore.2011.04.005.

Impact of spirituality/religiosity on mortality: comparison with other health interventions — PubMed (nih.gov)

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Avoidance of Pain

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Avoidance of Pain

January 24, 2024 | Katie Lawliss, Psy.D. | 5 min. read

As human beings, our survival instincts lead us to avoid pain. While it makes sense to avoid pain in the sense that touching fire would hurt and burn us, we have begun to apply avoiding pain too broadly.

“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.” — Haruki Murakami

Avoidance of Pain OMHG Blog

There is a big difference between pain and suffering.

When we apply the idea that we should avoid pain too broadly, it has led us to avoiding sadness, anger, disappointment, vulnerability, and more. To avoid pain, oftentimes means to not engage with what is meaningful.

To love, oftentimes means to be sad, angry, disappointed, anxious, and unsure. No matter how secure a relationship is, there will be times when your partner disappoints you, you may be mad at them, or feel sadness when something goes differently than planned. If you were to not open yourself up to the inevitable pain, you would not be vulnerable enough to have a deep close relationship with anyone.

Without acceptance of the fact that pain is inevitable, people tend to be very risk averse.

Wanting to avoid pain may mean that you do not open your own business, buy a house, move across the country, build a family, or even call an old friend. All things in life come with the possibility of pain but we often trick ourselves into believing that if we can control our life enough, we can avoid pain.

In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, there is a distinction between “clean pain” and “dirty pain”. Clean pain is the pain itself, the discomfort, the emotion that feels uncomfortable. Dirty pain is the feelings about the clean pain, which is where suffering lies.

Have you ever beaten yourself up for feeling disappointed or anxious? Maybe you are nervous to bring up something a friend said that hurt your feelings, and you say to yourself “It is stupid that I am even upset about this” or “Why am I always nervous to be assertive, I am so mad at myself for being anxious about this”. That is dirty pain, your feelings about the initial feeling.

There is freedom in allowing yourself to experience pain and to do so without following it up with judgment about your reaction to pain.

Consider all that you have done in life to avoid pain, what have you missed out on due to this? Consider the times you have experienced pain, how did you react to the fact that you had a reaction to pain, that you experienced pain in the first place? What might your life look like if you opened yourself up to the inevitability of pain and did not judge yourself? Has it been effective to judge your reaction to pain? Has it been effective to avoid or work to get rid of feelings and experiences that are uncomfortable? Has this led to a more meaningful life?

Notice how the world has sold us that the idea that avoiding pain is not only a worthwhile goal, but an attainable one. Going forward, notice what messages you receive from the world about pain and look at it in a new lens given the questions I asked above. I think you may notice the importance of not only knowing that pain is inevitable but allowing yourself to experience it. You are more resilient and capable than you think and living with the knowledge that pain is inevitable will open you up to new experiences and add to your purpose.

If you find yourself struggling with this shift, talk to a therapist about it, explore the concept with your friends or family, do more research on how to live a meaningful life and cope with discomfort.

Our therapists at Orchard Mental Health Group are happy to help you navigate through life’s pain and be more accepting of yourself in the process.

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