Healing Through Forgiveness Therapy

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Healing Through Forgiveness Therapy

October 22, 2024 | Lysa Kirby, LCPC | 3 min. read

Healing Through Forgiveness Therapy

Forgiveness is often an act to simply let go of a betrayal. However, within the therapeutic realm,  forgiveness is a journey to seek personal growth, healing and obtaining an effective method of  navigating trauma-related symptoms. It is not something that is found easily, but a process that  takes time and patience during therapy sessions.  

What is Forgiveness Therapy? 

Forgiveness therapy encourages the individual to process their emotions and past emotional wounds, which is followed by a therapeutic release of entrenched emotions such as anger and  resentment. It is through this process that the clinician will assign therapeutic exercises such as  journaling or a video diary to guide the individual through this process. 

Why Forgiveness Matters for Mental Health? 

Forgiveness therapy is important because holding on to emotions, such as anger and resentment,  can often exacerbate mental health symptoms and create stress-related health challenges.  Physical ailments, such as high blood pressure and a weakened immune system, have been linked  to the aforementioned symptoms. Additionally, forgiveness therapy can improve relationships, reduce overall stress levels, and provide a sense of emotional freedom. 

How does Forgiveness Therapy work?

The overall premise of forgiveness therapy is to process emotional wounds and work toward  healing in a safe and therapeutic environment. This process can be challenging, specifically for  those navigating intense trauma or abuse. The initial step of forgiveness therapy is to  acknowledge that you have an emotional wound. Next, the individual must understand the  adverse impact of not forgiving, such as increased stress and possible health concerns. Lastly, the  individual must commit to letting go of the emotional pain. Deciding not to hold on to this pain  includes the act of separating the person from the act. 

Forgiveness therapy is a powerful tool that can help individuals heal and emotionally mature. 

 

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The Impact of Strong Communication in a Marriage

Home » Blog » The Impact of Strong Communication in a Marriage

The Impact of Strong Communication in a Marriage

October 22, 2024 | Lysa Kirby, LCPC | 5 min. read

The Impact of Strong Communication in a Marriage

Communication is essential for a marriage to excel. It is through communication that couples  express their thoughts, emotions, relationship needs, and resolve conflict. Although it is the foundation of a productive marriage, communication is often a source of tension within the  union.  

Below you will explore why communication is important within a marriage, typical barriers, and  ways to foster effective communication.  

Why Communication Matters in Marriage

At the center of communication, it is about understanding your spouse. Specifically, it is about  understanding your mate’s wants, needs and overall outlook on life. Communication in a  marriage is vital because:  

  1. Emotional Intimacy: sharing your intimate thoughts and being vulnerable within your marriage creates a deep emotional intimacy that helps to bond one another.  
  2. Conflict Resolution: Being able to convey one’s perspective effectively and implement active listening skills to hear your spouse helps to build a mature relationship.  
  3. 3. Shared Goals and Values: being able to communicate your values and life aspirations creates a shared goal to aim for. Having shared goals and values provides a sense of togetherness.

Common Barriers to Communication in Marriage

Despite the importance of communication, many couples struggle with it. Several common  barriers can get in the way of healthy communication within a marriage: 

  1. Assumptions: Many couples tend to assume that they know what the other person is  thinking. These assumptions often lead to disagreements and subsequent disconnect within the marriage.  
  2. Avoidance of Difficult Topics: Some couples try to evade topics that trigger vulnerable  emotions or topics they feel may lead to an argument. Avoidance can often end in  resentment and/or unresolved issues. 
  3. Emotional Reactivity: Many individuals rely solely on their emotions to navigate  conversations. This is a common irrational thought process known as emotional  reasoning. The premise of this thought method is that if you feel it then it must be the  truth.  
  4. Lack of Active Listening: Many couples listen to their partner with the purpose of  defending themselves versus understanding their spouses’ emotions and relationship  needs.  
  5. Technological Distractions: Today’s world is full of technological distractions that  pose as a barrier to developing an intimate connection within your marriage. 

Tips for Improving Communication in Marriage

  1. Practice Active Listening: Listen to your partner with the intention of understanding  their perspective. Provide your mate with your full attention to gain insight into their  relationship needs. 
  2. Use “I” Statements: Frame your concerns using “I” statements rather than “You” statements. This approach allows you to focus on how you feel versus placing blame.  
  3. Create a Safe Space for Vulnerability: Communicate with your spouse that your  relationship is a safe space to explore your feelings and express intimate thoughts without  judgment.  
  4. Schedule Regular Check-Ins: Ensure that both spouses check-in regularly with one  another to address relationship wants and needs.  
  5. Stay Calm During Conflict: Conflict can easily trigger intense emotions. Try to stay cognizant of remaining calm during these times.  
  6. Show Appreciation: It is easy for your partner to feel taken for granted. Make sure you  show that your spouse is loved and appreciated. 
  7. Work Together on Solutions: Work as a unit to resolve household matters. This  approach fosters a sense of togetherness.  

Effective communication is the cornerstone of a healthy marriage. It requires practice and effort to maintain the skills necessary for effective communication. Strong communication can form  the bond and intimacy needed for a long-term successful partnership. 

 

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The Importance of Setting Boundaries for Mental Health

Home » Blog » The Importance of Setting Boundaries for Mental Health

The Importance of Setting Boundaries for Mental Health

October 22, 2024 | Lysa Kirby, LCPC | 3 min. read

The Importance of Setting Boundaries for Mental Health

In today’s fast-paced world, the concept of “boundaries” has become a catchword in conversations about mental health. What does it truly mean to set a boundary and how vital is it  to the overall quality of your mental health? 

What Are Boundaries?

Boundaries are a course of action we create. Furthermore, it sets the tone of how we expect  others to treat us and how we manage our daily interactions. Forming these boundaries are  important to maintain a sense of balance within our lives.  

There are different types of boundaries: 

  1. Physical Boundaries: this includes an individual’s personal space.  
  2. Emotional Boundaries: establishing perimeters on how others influence your emotions.  
  3. Time Boundaries: choosing how much time you devote to an activity and/or person  versus self-care.  
  4. Work Boundaries: dividing workplace responsibilities from one’s personal life.  
  5. Digital Boundaries: overseeing how often to interact with social media/communication  platforms.

Why Boundaries Matter

Boundaries are necessary because they facilitate individuals in maintaining their emotional balance, safeguarding their well-being, and promoting healthier relationships. Without clear  boundaries, you may find yourself overwhelmed, resentful, or under emotional distress. Here are  several reasons why setting and maintaining boundaries are so important: 

  1. Reduces Stress 
  2. Personal Space 
  3. Prevents Burnout 
  4. Improves Relationships 
  5. Sense of Control 
  6. Reduces Resentment and Overwhelm 
  7. Promotes Emotional Well-Being 
  8. Encourages Self-Care 

How to Set and Maintain Boundaries 

Establishing boundaries is a competency that takes practice and is essential for guarding your  mental health. Below are five tips to maintain boundaries that have been set: 

  1. Identify Your Limits 
  2. Communicate Clearly 
  3. Stick to Your Boundaries 
  4. Practice Self-Awareness 
  5. Seek Support 

Boundaries are not meant to be taken lightly and they are not viewed as concrete ways to protect your peace of mind. By taking the time to develop boundaries within your life, you can reduce stressful moments and engage in healthier relationships. It is not rude to set boundaries; it is simply a form of self-preservation. 

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Tools to Address Autism Anger and Tantrums

Home » Blog » Tools to Address Autism Anger and Tantrums

Tools to Address Autism Anger and Tantrums

October 21, 2024 | Boma Ehanire, LMSW | 3 min. read

Tools to Address Autism Anger and Tantrums

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a neurological disorder and developmental disorder that affects how people interact with others, communicate, learn and behave (Dept of Health and Human Services, n.d.). Due to communication barriers that come as a result of the diagnosis, it may be difficult for children with autism to verbally express their frustrations or identify their emotions; as a result, tantrums are likely to occur. 

ASD is a spectrum, and is not to be mistaken as a diagnosis that is uniform to every individual based on higher or lower level of functioning.

Each individual is unique in their diagnosis, and their abilities are contingent upon their uniqueness. Notwithstanding; whether an ASD individual is verbal or nonverbal, communication challenges may still arise. In this article, tools will be addressed to assist a child with ASD, who may need support with anger and tantrums. Some suggestions are as follows: (Jovick, 2019)

  • Use your “pilot voice”. When communicating with a child with ASD who is on the verge of a tantrum, use a tone that is calm, clear, and unemotional. This allows the child to feel safe, and have a sense of control.  

  • Anger is a “watercolor” emotion. When a child is angry, it is typically a blend of other emotions that have“ bled together.” Parents may find it helpful to take a look at any underlying feelings the child may be experiencing such as disappointment, or sadness. 

  • Ensure your child is not tired, hungry, sick or thirsty. Children with sensory issues may be more sensitive in these areas and are likely to cause emotional disruption. 

  • Acknowledging that anger is an acceptable emotion, but setting rules when angry is important. For example, it is important to maintain “safe hands,” which means that the child should not destroy property, not hurt their self or others.

  • Sensory Overload – Ensuring your child is not having too much visual or auditory stimulation

  • When a child is having a meltdown, communicate what you would like your child to do, not what you don’t want them to do. When we tell a child what we do not want them to do, we assume they know what they should do. Model what you want to see. 

  • Routine is “safety”. Children have very little control over their world, this can be scary, creating a routine for a child with ASD helps their days become more predictable. This can reduce feelings of anxiety and fear, which may reduce tantrums. 

  • Give 20 minutes for “cool down”.  Allowing your child to cool off will allow their bodies the time they need to return back to “room temperature.” This could take slightly more or less time depending on your child and the circumstance.

References:

Novick, B. J. (2019). The angry child: What parents, schools, and society can do by Brett Novick – books on Google Play. Google. https://play.google.com/store/books/details/The_Angry_Child_What_Parents_Schools_and_Society_C?id=49KpDwAAQBAJ&amp%3Bhl=en_US&amp%3Bgl=US 

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (n.d.). Autism spectrum disorder. National Institute of Mental Health. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/autism-spectrum-disorders-asd 

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Building Adolescent Emotional Resilience

Home » Blog » Building Adolescent Emotional Resilience

Building Adolescent Emotional Resilience

October 1, 2024 | Lysa Kirby, LCPC | 3 min. read

Building Adolescent Emotional Resilience

Lysa’s Limericks

The adolescent developmental stage is filled with many complex areas such as relationships,  school, and their identities. Building emotional resilience throughout this time period will prove  valuable to successfully navigate life’s transition and challenges. 

What is Emotional Resilience 

Resilience is the ability to recoup following adversity such as elevated stress or trauma.  Resilience does not mean that stress does not affect you or that you avoid struggles in life. Resilience is feeling confident that you are capable of effectively managing challenges and regulating emotions.  

Strategies to Build Emotional Resilience 

  1. Support: having a strong support network of family and friends is an essential component of emotional resilience. Being able to confide in trusted support persons to both share  information and receive guidance promotes growth for an adolescent. A support system  also provides open communication and a safe place where an adolescent can feel  emotionally secure. 
  2. Model and Promote Healthy Coping Strategies: adults and caregivers should demonstrate  healthy coping methods when encountering episodes of stress. Teach strategies that will  lend itself to decreasing troublesome symptoms such as deep-breathing techniques,  meditation and grounding exercises. 
  3. Promote Emotional Awareness: help your adolescent identify their emotions. Teach them  to label their feelings and explain that it is healthy to express their various emotions.  Discuss ways to appropriately convey these feelings such as journaling or art. 
  4. Set Realistic Goals: ensure that your adolescent is setting realistic goals that are tangible. This approach allows the adolescent to be less likely to feel overwhelmed. Encourage your adolescents to reach their goals and acknowledge their achievements and any obstacles they may have faced along the way. 
  5. Teach Problem-Solving Skills: help your adolescent view a challenge with a systematic  approach. Teach them to identify the problem, generate possible solutions, weigh the pros  and cons, and then make an educated decision. 

Conclusion 

Building emotional resilience is a fundamental tool to instill within your adolescents. It is through the guidance of the adults and caregivers that adolescents can develop emotional maturity. 

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Reframing Your Thoughts: A Powerful Tool for Mental Health

Home » Blog » Reframing Your Thoughts: A Powerful Tool for Mental Health

Reframing Your Thoughts: A Powerful Tool for Mental Health

October 1, 2024 | Lysa Kirby, LCPC | 3 min. read

Reframing Your Thoughts: A Powerful Tool for Mental Health

Lysa’s Limericks

Have you found yourself in a cycle of negative thinking that you can’t seem to  break? This type of thought pattern, although common, can be destructive to a  person’s psyche. Challenging these thoughts and unconstructive patterns is an instrumental component to break this cycle; a technique called reframing your  thoughts.  

The Impact of Negative Thinking 

Thinking negatively is harmful for one’s emotional wellness. This pattern can  heighten anxiety, decrease confidence, exacerbate depressive symptoms and  often lead to a person avoiding their challenges in life because they feel it is too  difficult to manage.  

What Is Reframing? 

Reframing is a method of making edits to your thought patterns to a more helpful  and accurate description. This process fosters the individual to view a situation  realistically versus through a negative filter.  

The act of reframing can help navigate symptoms of emotional distress. It guides a patient to redirect negative thoughts and focus on thoughts that would be more  advantageous for their mental wellbeing. Additionally, this process helps build  emotional resilience and self-compassion. 

Ways to Reframe Your Negative Thoughts 

  1. Acknowledge the negative thought. Being aware of your negative thought  patterns is a vital step in making the necessary changes. Keep a log of these  thoughts to address them in more detail. 
  2. Challenge your Thought. Ask yourself if the thought is reality-based or is the result of a pessimistic outlook.  
  3. Replace the Negative Thought. Make the shift from the negative thought  to a more accurate or helpful version.  
  4. Gratitude Mindset. Practice having gratitude for the positive aspects of  your life. 

Conclusion 

Reframing your thoughts is an essential tool to maintain emotional balance. Being  able to reframe your thoughts lets one have a more positive perspective, which allows you to navigate life’s challenges with confidence and a sense of authority  over your own life. 

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