October is Invisible Illness Awareness Month. In honor of this, let’s dive into what invisible illness means and work to understand how it impacts one’s lived experience.

Disabilities and illnesses can be visible or invisible. Or sometimes a combination of the two.

It can be ever changing depending on how the person is feeling or progressing in their illness. Both invisible and visible disabilities have struggles associated with it. Invisible illness is exactly what it sounds like, it is a medical condition that is not visible to others.

Examples of invisible illnesses include psychiatric disorders, diabetes, heart conditions, and chronic migraine.

Whereas, visible illnesses have aspects of the condition that other people can see and, therefore, understand that there is a medical condition present. Examples include, someone with hair loss related to chemotherapy treatment for cancer, the use of a mobility device for someone with chronic pain, or particular facial features associated with down syndrome. This blog is focused on the intricacies of invisible illnesses, however both versions of disability and illness have valid struggles.

Whether you have a disability or not you may have either thought or heard some of these sentiments before:

A 40-something year old gets out of their car, that is parked in a handicap spot and does not use a mobility aid: “That person does not need the handicap parking space, they are not even disabled”

This person has cystic fibrosis and struggles to breath when walking the distance though the parking lot.

A 30-something year old has to cancel plans due to chronic pain and dizziness related to their condition: “He could walk yesterday, but now he can’t? He just doesn’t want to hang out with us, he always cancels.”

This person has chronic fatigue syndrome and is experiencing a crash after pushing himself through the work week.

A 20 year old woman goes to the doctor complaining of increased fatigue, joint pain, and sudden weight gain: “You look fine and are too young to be sick. Just get more exercise and watch your diet.”

This person has ovarian cancer but will not find out for over a year due to being “too young” for ovarian cancer.

A 15 year old girl is not keeping up with chores and homework: “She is just lazy and does not want to put the effort in.”

This girl has ADHD and wants to do her chores and school work but her executive functioning challenges make it so that she can’t keep up with the demands of home and school. 

All of these statements are rooted in ableism and the lack of knowledge about invisible illnesses. Unfortunately, it is not an uncommon experience in the invisible disability space.

Having an invisible illness is hard. One of the reasons it can be hard is because people may not believe that you are sick and have a lack of empathy for your difficulties because they cannot see the difficulties nor experience them.

It can also be exhausting to educate others and advocate for yourself so people will believe you. However, it is necessary to do so in order to have your needs met and take care of yourself. People with visible disabilities also need to advocate for themselves due to ableism in society. The difference for those with invisible disabilities is you also need to “prove” you are sick. And once you do, people may frequently forget because your illness is out of sight and out of mind to them. Although, living with the illness you do not get the luxury of your illness being out of sight and out of mind as you live with it daily.

While having an invisible disability is burdensome, due to living in an ableist society, the ability to be able to “hide” your illness can be helpful when facing prejudice and discrimination. The problem is that people with invisible disabilities are often taught to lean into this and hide their disability, which tends to cause more issues than benefits. It is important to know that having an invisible disability is valid and it is not their job to hide their disability from others in order to make them comfortable. Having a disability is not something to be ashamed of; however, being taught to hide the illness (because it is invisible) can lead to feelings of shame or lead to minimizing their needs and experiences.

Invisible illness means it is not readily visible to others. However, it does not mean that it is not valid and not visible to the person living with it every single day.

Support may not be directed towards them because people can not see the need for support. This does not mean that they don’t need support. People may make accusations that they are  faking the illness or not understand the variability of symptoms day to day.

It is important that if you experience an invisible illness that you can remind yourself that your disability is real and valid. Coping with the struggles that come with invisible disabilities mainly includes believing in yourself and your own experiences. If you are able to validate your experiences you can better advocate for yourself, notice ableism around you, and take care of yourself both mentally and physically. The more you are able to communicate about your experiences, even if others’ cannot see it, the more likely you are to gain understanding from your loved ones and get support when you need it.

Becoming a parent can be an amazing experience for many. Like most amazing things, it is not without difficulties as well. In fact, the period after labor and delivery of a baby is a huge emotional and physical shift for parents.

While perinatal mental health issues can start during pregnancy, postpartum is an especially sensitive time for emotional wellbeing.

Here are a few diagnoses and terms you may hear about the postnatal period.

Diagnosis #1: The Baby Blues

The Baby Blues refers to the period of time between birth and approximately two weeks after birth. While this is not an official diagnosis, it’s important to mention because it describes a distinct difference in functioning. Onset may occur right after birth, or a few days after birth, peaking around day 5 of postpartum. During the first few days after delivery of a baby, there is a huge drop in hormone levels that your brain and body are working to cope with.

Understanding what trauma is can be important for healing oneself and is important to help cultivate empathy and compassion for others.

This article may be triggering to some as it gives examples of trauma and discusses trauma and PTSD. The American Psychological Association defines trauma as:

1. Any disturbing experience that results in significant fear, helplessness, dissociation, confusion, or other disruptive feelings intense enough to have a long-lasting negative effect on a person’s attitudes, behavior, and other aspects of functioning.”

Traumatic events include those caused by human behavior (e.g., rape, war, industrial accidents) as well as by nature (e.g., earthquakes) and often challenge an individual’s view of the world as a just, safe, and predictable place.

 2. “Any serious physical injury, such as a widespread burn or a blow to the head.”

We’re here if you need to talk.

A trained psychotherapist can provide a compassionate and nonjudgmental space to help you understand and heal from trauma. By exploring your experiences at your own pace, they can help you identify how trauma has impacted your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Using evidence-based approaches like CBT or somatic techniques, therapists guide you in processing difficult memories, managing triggers, and building resilience. Together, you’ll work to reclaim a sense of safety, rebuild self-trust, and move toward a healthier, more empowered version of yourself.

Orchard Mental Health Group is a large Maryland-based private practice with offices in Rockville, MD and Frederick, MD, providing affordable, accessible, research-informed counseling, assessment, and medication management services to children, adolescents, and adults.

So what is really going on in the therapeutic relationship?

There are a few parts of this relationship that are important to understand.

First, your therapist genuinely cares about you.

As therapists we often hear clients worry that we do not really care about them and that we care because we are getting paid. It’s understandable why clients feel that way, because the fact is we are getting paid.

Therapy is a bit strange in that it’s a deeply personal experience with another person while also being a business transaction. However, therapists really do care about their clients. We are paid because this is how we support ourselves and make a living. Still, we would not choose this occupation if we did not genuinely care about others. You are building a relationship with your therapist and they are building a relationship with you. As a therapist, I deeply care for my clients and want the best for them. That genuine feeling of care is a main component of the therapeutic relationship.

Second, a healthy therapeutic relationship involves boundaries.

Boundaries in this relationship are to protect the client in many ways. It may seem strange that your therapist knows everything about you, but you know little to nothing about them. There is a reason for that. Therapy is typically the one space people have that is solely focused on themselves. There are very few times in someone’s life that they do something truly only for themselves and the time is only about them. Boundaries are important to help maintain therapy as that type of space and protect that time for you, the client.

If your therapist discussed their issues as well, like a friend or family member would, that space becomes clouded with another person’s needs. That being said, your therapist may share some personal information, we call this “self-disclosure”, when it’s relevant and may be helpful to the therapeutic relationship. Therapists are mindful about what they share and how it may impact the relationship.

Boundaries also include not having a dual relationship, which means having multiple roles within the relationship. For example, I cannot be both your therapist and your child’s volleyball coach. If I do not play your child in the final game, you may have an emotional response to that which would impact our relationship in therapy and take away from the work we are doing in therapy. There are many ways a dual relationship can negatively impact therapy and the client.

Third, therapists are human and make mistakes.

Mistakes range from harmless to harmful. A mistake could be something as simple as misremembering your aunt’s name to saying something harmful without the intent to do so (this does not include obviously harmful things). The important thing is to remember that when your therapist makes a mistake, it does not mean they do not care about you and are not taking the time seriously. Also, it’s important that after making the mistake, your therapist can recognize the mistake and talk it through with you if needed or do their own self work to address the issue outside of the therapy space.

That being said, there are some mistakes a therapist can make that really negatively impact the client. Communication is key in these moments because the therapist may not realize it is harmful. Communication allows for the therapist to work on self reflection and doing better once they know. However, if you feel like your therapist is not well educated in pieces of your identity such as race, sexual orientation, gender, or something else and it is harming you as the client through microaggressions, you have the autonomy to either discuss this with them or find a therapist who is a better fit. If you find yourself feeling harmed in the relationship often due to a lack of knowledge and/or willingness to work on their own biases, then it’s important to find a therapist who is a better fit for you.

Fourth, communication is key.

The therapeutic relationship is based on communication. If you are finding therapy not useful, it’s important to bring this up to your therapist because they can switch things up or revisit your goals to help them better understand. If you are feeling judged by your therapist or are nervous to be honest with them about something then let them know that. Perhaps you are upset about something that happened in a previous session. While it can be hard to communicate this, it can help your therapeutic relationship get even stronger and allow you to meet your goals. Communication is essential to any healthy relationship and that includes your relationship with your therapist. These conversations help deepen the relationship and make therapy even more effective.

Lastly, the therapeutic relationship is a healing experience.

Having a positive relationship with your therapist can help you understand what healthy relationships look like, what it feels like to be cared for, and help you realize that you deserve to be listened to and cared about.

I myself have been both a therapist in these relationships and also a client in these relationships. They are quite different from each angle but hold the same truths. I hope you have a positive healthy relationship with your therapist. If you are not in therapy yet or hope to have a better connection with a therapist you can contact us at OMHG to set up an initial appointment with one of our therapists.

Are you interested in speaking with a therapist?

Single session therapy is an excellent way to dip your toes into the world of therapy and see if it’s right for you. In just one focused session, you can address a specific concern, gain valuable insights, and explore strategies to move forward. It’s a low-commitment opportunity to experience how a therapist can support you, offering a glimpse into the benefits of professional guidance. Whether you’re unsure about ongoing therapy or simply need help with one issue, a single session can provide clarity and direction.

Orchard Mental Health Group is a large Maryland-based private practice with offices in Rockville, MD and Frederick, MD, providing affordable, accessible, research-informed counseling, assessment, and medication management services to children, adolescents, and adults.