Motivational interviewing for teens promotes behavioral change, helping adolescents overcome resistance and achieve positive growth.
Glimmers vs. Triggers
Most of us understand what a “trigger” is or have at least heard the word used (ex: “trigger warning”, “he got triggered”, etc).
Triggers are events, sights, sounds, etc that make a person feel less desirable emotions (ex: sadness, fear, regret, anger). Triggers are typically viewed as something a person would want to avoid, or to be aware of and prepare for when they know one is coming.
On the other side of the spectrum, many people have not heard of “glimmers” before.
I was introduced to the concept of “glimmers” during a Polyvagal theory training a few years ago. A glimmer is some small moment of beauty, uplift, or comfort during a regular day. For example, perhaps you are outside with your dog and you look up and happen to notice a gorgeous sunset. Many of us might notice it momentarily, but we don’t really “bank” that moment or even sit in it for a few minutes and truly turn our attention to it, let it soak in, and enjoy it.
This imbalance of awareness and incorporation of both concepts, can be a place to begin when attempting to manage things like anxiety or depression. If someone is suffering from depression or anxiety, there is often an abundance of “triggers” or “signs of danger” present for the person….things they are apprehensive about, that stack of work on their desk that makes them feel behind each time they see it during the day, the inspection sticker on the car that’s about to expire and they need to attend to, the hat on the rack that their late father used to wear when he took walks, etc, but they don’t have a lot of “cues of safety” or “glimmers” that they notice day to day. Sometimes an effective strategy is to purposefully identify glimmers during your day to day life and make them a more significant part of your day. You could snap a photo of that beautiful sunset and send it to your spouse or best friend with the word “glimmer,” if they know what you’re attempting. You could be sure to purposefully spend more than ten seconds when you spot a glimmer and instead sort of marinate in it for a minute….for example if you see a robin playing outside and robins make you think of a loved one, rather than just letting that thought cross your mind and leave, sit for a minute or two and watch the robin and think of your loved one. This lets that “sign of safety” register in your mind and help to balance or offset some of the many “signs of danger” we encounter day to day.
Once you are good at identifying and sitting with glimmers during your day, you can even expand this skill to a higher level of being able to mentally access those glimmers later when you could use one.
For example, if you have trouble getting to sleep, being able to recall the beautiful sunset you saw with the dog and the warm breeze on your face while you took it in, and mentally reliving/remembering/sitting with that glimmer again for a minute without your mind moving you on to something else, would be helpful in providing your mind with that “cue of safety” before bed.
So, tell a friend about “glimmers” and incorporate it into your friendship…sharing glimmers during the day as they occur. If you prefer to go it alone, during solitary moments, quietly take note of, and give a minute to those “cues of safety.” You just might find your mood to be better and your mind to be less overwhelmed by all the “cues of danger” out there due to the improved balance you are trying to create.
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